Friday, July 29, 2005

Humor: Advice to nude smokers

Ah, what the heck . . . we need some humor . . .

Taken shamelessly from Everything.com

If you are a habitual smoker, or even a casual smoker, eventually a situation will arise where you are without the protection of clothing and desiring a cigarette. This can be a dangerous situation. There are precautions you must take that under other circumstances would not be as necessary. Often a jittery smoker will grab a bathrobe or quickly slip into filthy, disease carrying clothes they find on the floor. This is not necessary! You can smoke in the nude in relative safety provided you follow some simple, common sense rules!

There are many situations that arise where smoking and nudity are common occurances. Nudist colonies, nude beaches and nudist groups often admit smokers and post stringent rules about how one must enjoy fine tobacco products. There are people who rarely wear clothes in the privacy of their own homes and choose to enjoy fine tobacco products. Those who are experienced rarely need rules pointed out to them. They have often learned via their own errors in judgment.

There are also special situations in which an average Joe might find themselves naked and desiring a fine tobacco product. You might be taking a long bath, in which case the water in the tub provides a natural insulation against ash and flaming debris. The most important rule in any such situation is to be careful. Remember that your bare skin is opposed to being burned and that the primary reason clothing was invented was to protect our beautiful bodies from flaming tobacco products.

Of course there are other forms of fine tobacco than the common cigarette. There are other products which can be smoked when one is naked. Special caution must be taken with a pipe and only experienced pipe smokers should smoke a pipe while naked. One who is not experienced in the ways of the tobacco pipe may find much ash and flaming debris flying into the air, especially if one accidently exhales with the pipe in one's mouth. A cigar is also very dangerous to smoke when nude as one does not "flick" the ash and the volume of potential flaming debris is increased, especially if it is a cheap cigar. Products such as marijuana cigarettes are very popular with nude smokers and carry their own dangers. Smoking of marijuana may make it difficult to concentrate on the fate of ash and flaming debris. Depending on the quality of product and the ability of the marijuana cigarette roller, you may experience great danger to your exposed body. A pipe, bong, or other smoking apparatus may be better when one chooses not to wear clothing.

Just be careful out there. Someone might be watching. They might be crazy. They might be armed.

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