Thursday, April 12, 2007

Friends Don't Let Friends Wear Cold, Clammy, Soggy Wet Bathing Suits!

Shamelessly lifted from the Cabana To Go website. Give them a visit for some fun chuckles.

The following is a Public Service Announcement presented with the compliments of Cabana To Go

WARNING! Bathing Suits could be a major contributor to drowning deaths! In fact, informal research shows that in 99.9999 % of drowning deaths, the victims were invariably wearing either a bathing suit or some other equally inappropriate article(s) of clothing! Whereas people who avoid the bathing suit, thereby swimming naturally as God intended (so called skinny dippers) tended to tempt this ill fate of accidental drowning far less often and in fact incidents of drowning while naked are virtually undocumented anywhere!

It is no great stretch of the imagination that people who risk the bathing suit also probably make many other equally stupid, life threatening mistakes further contributing to the loss of life. But the bathing suit, or some other articles of clothing alone or in combination seem to be the greatest common denominator among all drowning deaths, so be warned. With a government so avowed to serve and protect us from even our own stupidity such that almost no freedom remains sacred, this researcher is just amazed that there is no government department or program to save us from the peril of the bathing suit. One must wonder just how many more people must die before someone steps in to ban the bathing suit. No doubt the textile/fashion lobby is perhaps even more powerful than government itself and would do anything to thwart such an initiative. Yet any other product that accounts for or is so closely associated with so many deaths annually would immediately come under very strict scrutiny!

At the least there should be this WARNING Label on EVERY bathing suit:

WARNING: besides unsightly tan lines this product has (at the least)
been shown to be closely associated with drowning deaths!
Any attempt to try to swim in this thing could result in immediate death!

We need and deserve a Federal Law that prohibits "swimming while impaired" by bathing suit. Do your bit by swimming naked everywhere and every time. Show your patriotism (among other things) and set a good example for your fellow man by avoiding this fiendish bathing device.

Introducing The NUDESUIT
for people who just can't bare to wear a bathing suit
So bare - you'll barely know it's there at all !!


  • very light-weight - weighs exactly nothing
  • easy to pack- takes up no room in luggage
  • one size fits all - UNISEX styling
  • no tan lines - completely transparent to sunshine
  • coordinates with all fashion accessories
  • no wind resistance - dries instantly
  • wrinkle free - the suit, not your body
  • fool everyone - only you know you're not naked
  • made of the same great miracle fabric as:
    • The Emperor's New Clothes &
    • Lady Godiva's Riding Outfit



If you should choose to remove your NUDESUIT for any reason, PLEASE be very careful where you place it or you won't be able to find it when it is time to put it back on

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